My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Say something about gay babies.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
