yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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