don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
