should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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