I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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