In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
