Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
