This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
