Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
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