Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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