seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
