I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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