waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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