i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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