the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
My bed is full of blood and feathers
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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