My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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