i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
