Me too!
I cockslap morals
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Randomize
