she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
