awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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