The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize