He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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