angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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