Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize