I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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