Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
