it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
