Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize