I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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