4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
We smell like vodka and hangover
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