So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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