16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
