am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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