I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
