everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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