i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
