i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize