every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
