We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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