I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
