soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize