It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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