Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
