It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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