Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I have feelings that need drinking.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
