um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
