remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
