Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
