Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Randomize
