Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Green mimosas i think yes
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
