my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
